ninety five

you know how people complain of writer's block?
i think i just have block-
like an all around life block.
really its just like an emotional block
in combination with writer's block, student's block, daughter's block, sister's block, friend's block, etc...
pretty much anything block-ish.
i know i'm just stressed with finals,
but it's like everything i do and say comes through this little screened filter before i am able to proceed with it.
and everything big, everything small, and everything in between has clogged it up.
i can't even think anymore
i feel paralyzed.
like an auto pilot that can't be turned off
so you just hope and pray it doesn't decide to crash.
i miss people but can never say it.
not in a serious way at least.
but i miss her.
a lot.
things are different and that's freaking me out!
remember how i'm totally NOT falling apart?!
okay good! haha
i find it intriguing how my mind is spinning so fast i can't keep up enough to form a complete strand of thought.
it's like i'm on speed-
but don't worry, i'm not.
i'm exhausted.
i'm out.
ciao.

ps...happy channukah!
(not a fan of matzo ball soup)