one hundred twenty five

RIP Gordon B. Hinckley
1910-2008

what an amazing man. what else is there to say?

we all know how i've had my issues with religion/spirituality/myself/pretty much everything else in the world, but no matter what was going on in my life, i have always had nothing but the highest respect and adoration for president hinckley. you know they're great if they're called to be prophets of God, but there was just something about him that bought me the greatest sense of peace. i don't know if it was the sincere kindness in his eyes that are nearly impossible to find in this world today... i don't know if it was his sweet disposition as he cracked jokes in the middle of giving a talk... i don't know why. what i do know is that every day i drove up the same street to go to work- you know the one that goes through the eagle gate and passes right next to his apartment with their green tinted bulletproof windows that looks directly onto the temple? everyday i would think of him as i drive by and suddenly all of the craziness in my head didn't seem that catastrophic. i thought to myself about what it would be like if i somehow met him one day and had to admit that i didn't go to church anymore, and had some wine every now and then, and wasn't quite as temple worthy as i used to be. but i genuinely don't think he would have judged me for it and feel like he was the only living person on this earth that honestly wouldn't. so now i'm sitting here with tears streaming down my face, so grateful for a man that i have never met. i seriously can't believe i am crying so hard over this. i can't believe i'm crying- its been over a year- it's like a miracle in and of itself! but you know what, it feels good. i'm not sure if this was the best night to have put a facial mask on because it is now dripping down my face, but thats okay. sorry, this isn't supposed to be about me! president hinckley will probably always be the first person i think of when i hear the word "prophet." he has been the prophet for the majority of my life! he was the prophet when i was baptized, he was the prophet when i first went into the temple to do baptisms for the dead, he was the prophet i admired, revered, and prayed for since the time i said my bedtime prayers as a primary child, through the time i'd cry through my prayers at the center for change! i'm so grateful for all he's done for the church, i'm grateful for all that he's done for the world, and i'm grateful for all that he unknowingly has done for me. i'm not sure why i'm so sad over this since i went to primary and know all about how he must be so happy to be back with the savior and able to be with his wife again. i can't imagine how much he must have missed her. thank god for eternal marriages, huh? i guess i'm just sad to see such an amazingly kind and influential man leave a world that still so desperately needs him. but i understand. and i'm happy for him. and i'm sure the next prophet will be a good one too. but i'll just miss him, that's all. here's to president hinckley. :)